Parenting Predicament

Really fast, before I start, MY BOOK IS OUT NOW!!!  The Whisper in the Waterfall is available at these sites: the physical copy here, https://www.createspace.com/4360794; and the e-version here, http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00DZ1EV42 .  I am very excited about this…  Now onto my thoughts… 

There is so much we are not supposed to say to our children anymore.  We can’t call our daughters princesses because it establishes a male dominated society.  We can’t say, “hurry up” to our children because it makes them think that we don’t have time for them.  We can’t tell them that we look fat because they will have a negative body image. We can’t let our kids read certain books, or play with certain toys because we want them to “be themselves”.  We can’t call a paper bag lunch a “brown bag lunch” because it is racist.  We can’t yell at our children in public, even when they are being 100% bad.  We can’t spank our children.  Society is always telling that we can’t do all these things…. 

Don’t get me wrong, I agree with the idea and thought process behind all these things.  (I still call my daughters princesses though ;-)  ) It is just hard sometimes.  You read all these blogs and statements posted by different people and you get overwhelmed.  You look at pinterest and all these amazing ideas people have. I actually get frustrated and wonder how I turned out the way that I turned out.  Obviously the people reading and posting these blogs are the people that are going to be spending time and trying to be the best parent they can be and the people that are not reading them, couldn’t care less and their kids are going to do what they are going to do no matter what. 

My parents are amazing people.  They did the best that they could do raising us, and frankly, I think they did a pretty good job (not to toot my own heart).  They raised me to be a self-thinker, to be God fearing, to be a princess, to do the best that I could at everything that I can do.  The founding Fathers, all the major leaders and great people in this world were raised by parents also and guess what… They did all this WITHOUT THE INTERNET!!!  That’s right people.  Parents have been parenting and doing a good job of it before blogs were invented and before everyone had an opinion on EVERYTHING.  Many of the very best parents in the whole world followed some great advice- they followed the Bible. 

So here it is people, the parenting advice that has been around for the ages:

Proverbs 22

V1: A good name is to be more desired than great wealth.  Favor is better than silver and gold.

                        Do not let your name and the name of your family be tarnished. 

V2: The rich and the poor have a common bond; The Lord is the maker of them all.

                        You aren’t better than anyone else, the Lord created everyone and everything

V3: The prudent sees the evil and hides himself, but the naïve go on and are punished for it.

                        YOU ARE NOT PERFECT!  Admit it!  Let your kids and your friends see that.

V4: The reward of humility and the fear of the Lord are riches, honor and life. 

                        Be humble.  Fear God and honor your life.

V5: Thorns and snares are in the way of the perverse; He who guards himself will be far from them.

Guard your heart.  Guard your children’s hearts, guard what you expose yourself to.

V6:  Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it!

Self-explanatory.

I don’t know if your kids are the same as mine, but they reflect EVERYTHING that I do and say.  Whether I do things right or wrong, they are going to grow up and have to make their own decisions.  Our job isn’t to shield them from everything, but to prepare them to make the right decisions when push comes to shove. 

I am nowhere close to perfect.  My kids are nowhere close to perfect (as was witnessed on our huge shopping excursion yesterday).  The only thing that is perfect in my life is my God.  For centuries mothers and fathers have been raising their children up to the best of their ability.  Just do what you can do, don’t stress over all the political correctness and the worry about if your status on the social media is just perfect.  Remember this, 9 times out of 10, right after someone posts something amazing their child does, the kid goes and does something that makes them want to pull their hair out. 

My kids stress me out daily.  These are the Biblical virtues to pray for your children to have in their lives. I really liked this that my friend shared with me.  This isn’t some mother’s idea of a perfect parenting solution, it isn’t telling you what not to do, it is just saying, these are biblical virtues that you can pray for your children and yourself.  http://www.raisinggodlychildren.org/2012/03/31-biblical-virtues-to-pray-for-your.html 

I have been really stressed out by my kids lately.  Stressed to tears!  My friends encouraged me last Thursday at Life Group and it went something similar to this… For those out there doing the best that they can do, you are amazing; no one else could raise your children any better than you currently are.  God gave them to you and you are doing exactly what you need to be doing to get through the season of life that you are in. 

I want to add to this.  God gave your children to YOU- He didn’t give them to the pastor; He didn’t give them to your best friend; He didn’t give them to the person posting picture after picture of how wonderful their children are or even when their kids end up tearing their house apart, they can still say how much they love their kids and love being their parent.  God gave them to YOU.  He knew your personality, He knew your life situation, He knew exactly what you were like and your life situation BEFORE He gave you these kids. 

Psalm 139:13-14 “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.  I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”

So when you look at your kids and can’t handle them, or when you look at yourself in the mirror and say, WHY?!?!?  Why, God, did you give me these kids?  Why did you make me a parent?  Did you REALLY know what you were doing?  Just know; you are not alone.  Just do your best and God will BLESS the rest, even if your best seems really really stinky compared to wonder parent.